Drowning in calm waters

I was drowning in calm waters nothing but my face poking up

And no one knew it because I wasn’t panicked

All my flailing was hidden beneath the water masked as treading water

For years I hid my depression

For years I hid it because I thought people would think less of me

Or that no one would understand

I kept just barely treading water for over a decade

Till I drowned then found myself breathing air again

And still I hid my shame

I hid my scars

I hid my depression from everyone

Till the day I asked for help and people were surprised

But not as surprised as when I started writing about it.

They said I never knew

I said cause I was an a

Expert at hiding from myself and from everyone else

Now I swim in the water not drowning

Trying to teach others how to do more than just tread water.

Screaming till I’m blue in the face you’re stronger than you think

Stronger than you know

Stronger than the depression

You just need help

We all need help sometimes.

Sometimes we’re too beat down to stand and we need a hand to help us up

To help us carry our burdens

Don’t drown reach out

Don’t do like I did and hide it for years

Speak its name depression

And realize that doesn’t give it power

It gives you the power to ask for help and receive it.