Biting My Tongue 

I’ve spent so much of my life biting my own tongue 

So as not to speak the words i wanted to speak but didn’t need to 

I wish I bite my tongue without tasting blood and bile 

Without having to choke down words 

That need to be said 

I wish I could speak my truth always 

Without having to worry about others feeling and triggers 

I wish I could pronounce Love and Trust without feeling fear 

I wish I could speak the truth inside my heart without biting my tongue 

I wish i could speak with more tact instead of either biting my tongue and tasting blood  

Or spewing forth things that need to be said in a better way 

I wish that words flowed forth from my mouth they way do on paper 

But they don’t I wish I could  

I wish I could have known the right words to say 

I wish I could have kept certain friendships and relationships alive 

I want to be able to speak like i can write but that feels like a vain hope 

My mind that jumps around a freight train with jump jets and rockets 

Or like my new favorite euphemism like a coke addled raccoon  

I can’t seem to keep up with conversation or get ahead enough to do so 

So, I’ll keep writing the words i wish i could say and hope to one day stop biting my tongue